Authentic {A New Year’s Post & Photos from 2015 Roundup}

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I have been trudging through lots of self reflection as the year came to a close.  And looking ahead… for the sake of all things ‘new year’, a new word to use as a reminder of where my heart is leading me.  And my word is “authentic”.  Authentic.

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In listening to my children these last few weeks, they have been telling me a lot of random facts that they have learned from friends, school, family, shows, movies, and books, and after each fact, they’ll usually say, “its the truth”.  They take whatever is in front of them as truth.  Whatever they are told, is true in their minds.  I could tell them that the sun was cold and the clouds tasted like sugar, and they would probably at some point believe it as truth.  Little sponges.  Its a beautiful thing for them. Its an innocence that I will guard and keep safe as long as I possibly can.  But its also caused me to examine my own heart, my own words… are they truthful, are they authentic.

Brandon would tell you that I am sometimes too authentic… haha, see too much of anything can be bad.

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But honestly, I have a lot of areas I could grow in regarding authenticity.  I want my love to be authentic.  God’s is.  Jesus’s love for the world was so authentic it was nailed to a cross.  Fearsomely authentic.  I could use some of that practically infused into my day.  Into the way I speak to my children when they are driving me up the wall, into the way I tell my daughter for the 10th time to do something, into the way I communicate with Brandon.  Why do I fear Jesus’s love in those moments?  Because really, His love is what will renew me when I need it the most.  We all are drawn to authentic love, but perhaps its our pride, my own pride getting in the way.  Pride is not authentic. Its the least authentic.  Its very unauthentic.  You get the drift.

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I also what to live an authentic life.  I desire to look into the roots of why I behave a certain way, and start uprooting those things.  Replacing them, with God’s truth.  The last thing this world needs is another person who claims to be a Christian, yet fails to carry out the truth of Christ.  I can say lots of things, but if my words were truly authentic, then my life will show proof of it.  I can only imagine all the rocky roads that lie ahead for me.  But I always did like a challenge.  God has really just been convicting me of so many things, and also putting a lot of strong desires in my heart.  He has been bringing me to scriptures that are equipping me, and to ones that are making it harder and harder to ignore this whole ‘authentic’ ideal.  I desire to live an authentic life, have an authentic marriage, be an authentic woman, speak authentic words, and pursue Jesus with an authentic heart.

1 John 1:6 (from the Message)  ‘If we claim that we experience a shared life with him and continue to stumble around in the dark, we’re obviously lying through our teeth– we’re not living what we claim.’

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And I guess if you know me personally, I should apologize now, because I am sure you’ll see me stumbling along like a drunkard, messily sloshing through life as I press on through this next year.  Isn’t that the truth?  We get all excited and feel like we have a clear vision… but the reality of what it looks like is messy and far from perfect.

(remainder of the above passage from the Message)  ‘But if we walk in the light, God himself being the light, we also experience a shared like with one another, as the sacrificed blood of Jesus, God’s Son, purges all our sin.’

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